HOW DO THINGS WORK?

64px:

sweet dreams are made of bees, who am i to diss a bee, travel the world with the seven bees, everybodys looking for……….bees

compsognathids:

Good April fool’s day prank: replace everything in someone’s house with bees.

qwantzfeed:

you know what? YES. yes i would like to subscribe to your newsletter. and you say you send it out each day at around 6pm? perfect! PERFECT.

❝ That’s how we do it in the Nine-Nine, sir. Catch bad guys and look good doing it. ❞

— Me all day every day

mightyflower:

to quote hamlet act III scene iii line 92, “no”

febricant:

giraffepoliceforce:

I really want a science fiction story where aliens come to invade earth and effortlessly wipe out humanity, only to be fought off by the wildlife.

They were expecting military resistance. They weren’t counting on bears.

Literally I would read thousands of words of this. 

johnlockanddestielatemysoul:

christianmakesjokes:

hello yes, I would like to purchase one night stand.

cAN WE ALL JUST PAUSE AND APPRECIATE THIS PUN

sararye:

letswishuponastar:

A good friend knows when to hold you back.

best friend knows when to let go and let you rip into a bitch.

I like Stitch’s selfie in the middle of the pictures

lilo is the most badass disney character

jerryterry:

Boy touches drink without spilling it. Girl is shocked and amazed.

(Original gif [x])

not-cooper:

OH GOD I’VE LOST CONTROL

pancakiest:

pew pew

heatherm00ch:

blancadiabla:

safety tips from Anubis

oh my fucking god

pixiedust-paycheck:

hiril-anwyn:

My kinda princess gear

Somewhere, Merida is rejoicing.

newisoldoldisnew:

The dildo chooses the user. That much has always been clear to those of us who have studied sex toys…. The best results, however, must always come where there is the strongest affinity between user and dildo. These connections are complex. An initial attraction, and then a mutual quest for experience, the dildo learning from the user, the user from the dildo.

-Mr Olivander

"As there is little foolish dildo-waving here, many of you will hardly believe this is masturbation…" 

-Professor Severus Snape

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